My weekend was ok, went to PD with officemates. Guess what? I’m the only Malay there. I just realize that when the day itself! Ahahah! But it was fun though, minus the drinking session ye kanak-kanak. I enjoyed the night with others watching Man U been thrashing by Arsenal, it’s better if they draw, but I hate Man U mucho, so it is fun. Also, Keane finally scored.
So on Sunday, I supposedly company my mother. But suddenly she text me that she can’t drive, so postponed to next week. I feel so sad. I’m not supposedly complaining all these years, for being driver in the house, but I never expressed it in front of my parents. It just I felt that way previously. My ibu’s said that she’s afraid if suddenly she loses control while driving and only Amni as company. Sad.. From now on, I will never feel that way again!!
Before that I was so tired and lazy to go because just got back from PD. So I told ibu that I’m not going, ibu replied,” ibu takde kawan la macam tue, yang lain tue teman je, nanti ibu takde kawan nk borak. “
I realize all these year she threat me as a friend. But now, she appointed me as a friend for the first time..
I so realize now, I’m not supposedly worried much about other people besides my family. I should focus more towards them. Yes, I am complaining before that they always depend on me so much, every single of them. I am sorry for myself for doing that. Maybe I felt that way because of I don’t have any place that I can depend on, in return. I just.. tired.
Family will never betray you.
For now on, I will try my best for everyone. I will put everyone rather than myself, I know if I put mine than them, I will regret if anything happen to them.
It’s not I’m not trying for others besides my family, I had, I tried so hard. But lately I’m the one who always left out. No one really care about your feelings besides yourself and you know, family will never ever leave you. It’s hurt me so much when it happens. So back to basic, I should put family on top.
And I’m so worried about ibu.